TheYeshiva.net - Rabbi YY Jacobson

The Lubavitcher Rebbe's Letter on Women Abuse

In a 1955 Letter, the Rebbe Shares a Warning to a Husband Abusing His Wife

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The Lubavitcher Rebbe's letter on women abuse.

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A
Avigayil -3 years ago
And no protection for the woman's literal life?
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- MY
  mendel yakovson -1 year ago
  what?!?! GOD is the protection for the woman's literal life! cant beat that!!! lichayim vilivracha
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  - M
    Miriam -1 year ago
    Nah, abusers abuse people and cause damage and we as a society can let them or protect people from them. Im sorry, this isnt about Gd protecting women its about an attitude to women in society which enables abuse
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- CP
  Anonymous -6 months ago
  He's clearly trying to protect her. We don't know the back story. Was it a get refusal? Was the wife still wanting to stay in an abusive marriage? The Rebbe used all his means and compelled the parents to use their influence to pressure him to change, and also wouldn't allow his parents to take their son's side, which is often something that adds insult to injury and allows abusers to get away with murder.
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Anonymous -3 years ago
Where is this letter found?
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- Anonymous -3 years ago
  Click on "View source sheet"
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Anonymous -3 years ago
Rabbi you have no idea what it means to me that you are sharing this. Literally watching and crying and feeling the love and care of the rebbe.
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W
wertheimer -3 years ago
Wow, I'm blown away by this letter.

A person can push their Yetzer Hara to be worse than it would be on it's own. This is wild.

It touches on so many points including parenting.
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Anonymous -3 years ago
Very poweful lettter !

Thank You for sharing it

Do you know the end of the story, what happened to the bocher in the end, ....... or does anyone else know?
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SG
Sarah Goldberg -3 years ago
The usual case when a man is being compelled to give a gett (excess coercion means possible mamzerim because of an invalid gett); or is being scolded like in this letter, is when he refuses to go to beis din when summoned or refuses to comply with a psak when so ordered.

We don't know the facts of the case behind this letter. Because it's more frequent those 2 scenarios are more likely

But there are many other scenarios where this letter does not apply. Sometimes it's the woman who refuses to accept the gett (both have veto power) and sometimes the woman isn't complying with conditions.

The mere fact of "he's not giving a gett" does not give us sufficient information to know who is at fault and it's premature to attribute fault to the husband without more information.

Moreover, the mere passage of time without a gett also bears investigation. Suppose the wife is given a condition, like allow the husband to have some parenting time with the kids and she refuses. Beis din powerless to enforce such a decision. Can she, while refusing such parenting time to the husband/father still demand a gett when both the parenting time and the gett are part and parcel of the same psak? Can she violate one part of the psak while demanding fulfillment of another part?

Bottom line is that it is insufficient to just say "she has no gett" and "she's been waiting along time". One must examine for the emes of all facts.
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