Women's Vaeira Class
Rabbi YY Jacobson
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Dedicated by Norma Blum in memory of my father Duvid ben Nussen haCohain.
לעילוי נשמות הרה״ח משפיע דתו״ת הת׳ מנחם זאב בן אברהם יחיאל הלוי, לרגל היארצייט כ"ב טבת. ואשתו מרת אסתר בת ר׳ משה שו״ב ע״ה. תנצב״ה.
This weekly women's class was presented on Tuesday, Parshas Vaera, 24 Teves, 5782, December 28, 2021, at Bais Medrash Ohr Chaim in Monsey, NY.
The class explores an incredible discourse by the Alter Rebbe, Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi, the author of the Tanya, on how at the end of history before the coming of Moshiach, the most acute crass and filth mixed into the "wine" and the "silver" gets exposed, hence allowing the soul of Israel to shite in its pristine goodness and glory. The class explores the cover-up of child abusers in our communities for decades, claiming so many untold victims. This is the age of healing and transformation, which includes exposing the evil and putting an end to a culture of lies and cover-ups. Truth prevails.
Women's Vaeira Class
Rabbi YY Jacobson
Dedicated by Norma Blum in memory of my father Duvid ben Nussen haCohain.
לעילוי נשמות הרה״ח משפיע דתו״ת הת׳ מנחם זאב בן אברהם יחיאל הלוי, לרגל היארצייט כ"ב טבת. ואשתו מרת אסתר בת ר׳ משה שו״ב ע״ה. תנצב״ה.
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Need help -2 years ago
U a molester rapist and want helpCall שלום בניך036182525 it all Confidencial
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ShmuelH -2 years ago
I think that R' Y.Y. did the best job he could under the circumstances. Like Giuliani after 9/11, he barely had time to process it himself before he had to talk about it publicly. We're talking about an extremely ignored and delicate subject, and I challenge all the naysayers to give a speech a day later. He had to give the speech with the info he had. give the Rabbi a break. Btw, I almost never listen to his speeches, but I think you still got to look at it from his POV.
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yd -2 years ago
Your message is (as usual) important and to the point.
Just one correction: The Yated did not write "tzaddik" -- just Zichrono Levracha (not abbreviated as z"l).
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Anonymous -2 years ago
At the time of Beit Hamikdash you needed 72 Rabbunim to Paskin on Deiny nefushes, not 2 Rabbnim
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Yosef Yitzchak Jacobson -2 years ago
In response to an email about this all being fake news from social media, and how can we embarrass his family, and all this should be dealt with confidentially, I wrote:
Thanks for sharing; but there was a Beis Din that interviewed 22 women (now it is a bigger number) and had access to recordings of him. Watch the interview with Reb Shmuel Eliyahu chief rabbi of Tzefas. So sadly, sadly, this is a true story, and worse than we imagine.
This was not social media; this was a beis din of fine people, including rabbi eliyahu who is known to be a sweet and kind and honest man.
Reb Shmuel said he asked Chaim walder to come, to apologize, to do teshuvah -- but he denied all and refused. Then took his life, and left that note in which he once again denied all.
It is so sad for the family, but do not blame the victims for speaking out, and the rabbis for warning others, this prevents more abuse and molestation. The blame is on the perpetrator who did this to his family. You can't blame the victims who spoke up and saved so many more.
If someone shoots children, do you keep it quiet, to protect his family, and endanger so many more c"v?!
With many blessings and besuros tovos!
much hatzlacha and ty for writing.
YYJ
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Rachel Cohen -2 years ago
Thank you so much for the talk in hebrew for the charadie public in Israel.
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moshe -2 years ago
Thank you Rabbi YY for advocating this vital message about what's going on under our carpets...!!
Stay strong and light up the darkness!!
The message that only a tiny part of the victims were molested, but they in total - especially the G-Dly soul - is stronger than everything and anything is also very important!!
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Beila -2 years ago
https://youtu.be/30qSueAmfbg
The story of the Nile in Egypt was very interesting, as was the description of the Egyptian culture.
Had I listened to this lecture a few months ago, I would have thought that you are just trying to get everyone to stop looking into what is happening in our culture and therefore you are saying that the Egyptians culture was immoral. It happens to be that I recently read a story that happened today's days, about a girl who grew up in Egypt. She described the culture of how she grew up in her book. She described how in her family, it was accepted for her brothers to touch her in all sorts of places. How there was no boundaries...
The story was about how her parents sold her into slavery... It was a long and very sad story that ended up having a good ending. So I do believe you that the Egyptian culture was and still is immoral.
I found it fascinating that the Egyptians didn't let the Jews get out. Another fascinating thing was that the Communists didn't let people out of the Soviet Union. Both the Egyptians and the Communists used force to try to prevent people from leaving. They did not succeed. The Slave owners in the USA also tried using force to prevent their slaves from escaping and they were not successful. People eventually find a way to freedom. I once read a quote (I think from Martin Luther king Jr) saying that the moral ark of the world is bent towards justice.
It seems like it was difficult for you to admit that there were/are problems in the Jewish community. I hear that you so much want to believe that the Jewish people are wonderful! I admire the fact that you tried to speak about Chaim Walders.
I very much liked what you said that Hashem knows the truth, and the truth comes up eventually... It is so so difficult to face the truth. I'll quote Elvin Semrad "The greatest sources of our suffering are the lies we tell ourselves." ( This quote was written in Bessel Van der Kolk's book- The body keeps score. Bessel was a student of Elvin Semrad.)
Compared to the Egyptian culture, perhaps the Jews are a little better... We can always keep on talking about how terrible the Egyptians were and how terrible the rest of the world is/was. We can also start to honestly look into own culture despite how painful the truth might be... You said it very well; that it's painful to see the pus of the infection come out, but if we don't let the pus come out we can die.
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yaakov -2 years ago
Hi Rabbi, it's heartening the way you spoke up against sexual abuse, thank you so much for taking such a strong stance against CW.
As a survivor myself this gives me hope in our religious leaders and faith in Judaism. That there is no tolerance for such behavior.. thanks again., your shiurim saved me emotionally and I reclaimed my spirituality, I'm connecting more and more to H' and Torah.
May H' bless you with all blessings.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Thank you for your wonderful Shiurim, which I enjoy immensely.
However, I was very disappointed by the "click and bait" title and the offending photo.
As Rabbi Abraham Twerski would say "ES PAST NISHT".
Unfortunately, it seems to have worked. Over 24,000 views.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Because "it works" is not a reason to justify something if its wrong!
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Abe -2 years ago
You worry about his family? CW brought it on them!
why don't you worry about 22 individuals that they struggle EVERY day every morning when they wake up,and their families their spouses their children?
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JEFFREY WEISS -2 years ago
I am addressing the people commenting that they are confused with Rabbi YY position on this, as a regular listener to the shiurim myself on this website, I was also initially confused, however, listen to it again, especially the short eight minute clip posted, he clearly mentioned Needing compassion for CW as well for falling prey to his lowly instincts, but what drives him mad is the outpouring of sympathy for cw and the suicide, more than the victims! Indeed, I myself felt nothing but disgust for CW BEFORE the suicide, and then suddenly afterwards, I started feeling like hey, maybe this is all wrong...and that is exactly what this man intended should happen! It was mentioned by other rabbis that the suicide was his last and ultimate act of abuse, designed to invoke pity on himself and away from the true victims! And for this I think rabbi YY is absolutely correct in emphasizing the victims, I hope this relieves some of the concerns of the many negative comments below. As for doubting the actual claims, please look yourself in the mirror and honestly ask yourself if the claims of 22 women and girls is an organized hoax, and do you really expect any of them to expose their face to worldwide media attention!? We are talking about frum orthodox women here, not goyish women who all want their moment of glory with the #metoo movement, of course they cannot come out with their true identity.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Do the halochos of Loshon Hora fall away, when one rav (Not my rav at all, and presumably not your rav either) declares someone as guilty? It wasn't yet a mainstream rabbinical decision to public shame CW. I'm a bit confused Rabbi Jacobson.
I do agree with you fully that this topic definitely needs addressing in the Jewish communities. And support and awareness is absolutely crucial. But what I don't understand how it can be addressed at the expense of jumping to conclusions of someone who has never sat in bais din. There are so many different rabbinical opinions (and its not my job to trust or believe any, I'm not a rav in bais din) on why events happened as they did. He may be right or very possibly wrong. I don't care. Its entirely not up to the jewish worldwide population to judge. This culture of public shaming and public discussion is so not Jewish. Or so I thought it was until this happened and you joined the bandwagon. I'm saddened at your speech. I think you brought more confusion than clarity. Yes his victims need support, and victims of all abuse need support. and perpetrators and evil people need to be dealt with severely. But can't we as faithful Jewish people leave it up to the capable hands of Hashem to do the punishing and judging? He needs not our help in giving His punishments to those who deserve it. I've thoroughly enjoyed each and every one of your shiurim. Can't awareness be brought in other ways? Or maybe using other people as examples. People who our Rabbanim have declared an allowance to public shame.
Please clarify the above, so that I can continue enjoying your shiurim.
Please also adress the suicide aspect of this. I find the silence about Jewish suicides equally confusing. If not, even more confusing.
Thank you.
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Gittel -2 years ago
Well said! Thank you
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Abe -2 years ago
What you mean leave to H to do the punishment to the abuser? You don't believe in just court system?
Leave them free till they abuse indefinitely??
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Surely I believe in a just court system! And of course I believe that abusers MUST be dealt with. I don't believe public shaming and public discussion comes under the title of a just court system. Having every unqualified individual jumping to conclusions and spreading it as fact, doesn't fall under the category of a just court system. Unless a psak was given by notable rabbanim to do so.
By mentioning Hashem not needing 'our' help, I was referring to the public, of course. Not the legal/rabbinical court/bais din, obviously.
Maybe I'm wrong. I don't know. I'm not qualified in this area either. I was just saddened by the approach here.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
There is a concept regarding hilchos lashon hara, that one is allowed to speak about somebody who did an aveirah, in order to encourage other people not to do so and to use it as an example. This has been brought down in the Torah, in scenarios where the Torah speaks about people's aveiros.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
I too was very confused after listening to this shiur and also partially angry. I usually love Rabbi yy's clarity and sense of truth but I didn't feel that here. It was a personal opinion given as fact. With the power of publicity, I think the Rabbi should be more careful especially in such a sensitive case. Is it our place to talk this way? After all, we are mere human beings, why not leave the judgment to Hashem? He is the only One Who truly knows.
Our job in this world is to support, not destroy. I don't believe that the only way to support victims is by destroying the perpetrator. What about his family? I wish Rabbi yy had been more compassionate and true to his usual (i thought consistent) belief that everyone ultimately has a shining neshomo despite going through an intense and painful journey... No one is wholly evil. Yet he was portrayed this way. And that left me very unsettled.
And what about the חובת הלבבות that no one can cause harm to another that is not preordained למעלה.
Rabbi yy is siding with the victims. I don't think our job is to take sides. Our job now is to work on our אמונה through this deeply challenging time and try to give everyone necessary support. We can't know what happened. This world is filled with humans who are biased and interpret events according to their limited perception, influenced by their subconscious. Healing will only happen when we accept our vulnerability and lack of clarity and pray for the light of truth to ultimately be revealed and heal all of us. אמן בקרוב!
And until then, looking forward, we continue to try to protect ourselves and others, strengthen our faith and leave the judgment of the past in Hashem's capable Hands.
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Tania Benedid -2 years ago
It's definitely our job to side with victims.
As leaders and parents and mechanchim.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
You position is completely twisted. Someone who abuse people, wrecks peoples lives and causes them to be forbidden to their husband is competent evil and deserves no respect. The victims need our undiluted support. Shame on you
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Anonymous -2 years ago
I'm also a steady listener and was dumbfounded how this topic was discussed here in the very same place that we usually get clarity.
Rabbi YY talks so innocently about 22 victims. Hello I'm yet to see 1.
Due process is 1 of the שבע מצוות בני נח we don't need to go any further. Here is what I have observed in front of my eyes.
1. I have seen sex abuse with no one being accused
2. I have seen accusations with no abuse
3. I have seen monsters, pedophiles looking all day long to find other (supposed) predators
4. I have seen Chaim Walder getting a death sentence in the people's court without due process
Chaim walder may have been a bad man deserving death. He may also been innocent as well. We will never know the truth because of the דור המבול we live in where people get judged on a daily basis without due process which Rabbi YY officially joined now with this public stance.
I'm at least happy to see the resistance in the comments below. Rabbi YY has thought us well to not follow anyone blindly including himself. ומתלמידי יותר מכולם
Finally for that commenter that quotations another one's legitimacy of being a victim because she thinks different than you, shame on you!
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Anonymous -2 years ago
I agree with you 100%.
Thank you for writing it better than I could.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Lost all my respect for rabbi YY after listening to this class
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Anonymous -2 years ago
שלום וברכה לכל החברים היקרים!
לפני הכל אני חייב לומר שאני מקשיב המון המון לשיעורים הנפלאים של הרב גם באנגלית ואני מאוד מאוד נהנה, ולמדתי המון המון משיעורים הנפלאים!
וגם בנושא הזה שמעתי כבר כמה שיעורים ואני מסכים עם כל מילה!
ואני ח"ו לא מאלה שרוצים לחפות ולכסות על מפגעים ותוקפים רוצחי נשמות אכזריים
כי יש לי קרוב משפחה במעגל ראשון שנפגע אישית על ידי מפגע רע לב ואכזרי ואני יודע היטב מה ההשלכות יכולות להיות....
ואינני בא להגן על אף אחד וצריכים לנקוט פעולות בכל חומר הדין נגדם להוקיע אותם מתוכנו.
בלי להתייחס לשאלה אם העדיות נכונות או לא. ( שבאופן תמוה מכל העדיות שהרב קיבל אין אף תלונה במשטרה!!!!!!!)
אני רוצה להתייחס בעיקר לעובדה המוזרה שהציבור החרדי בארץ ישראל נתן לרב הראשי של העיר צפת שנמנה על רבני המגזר הדתי לאומי להוביל ולהחליט בסיפור הזה!
הרב הנ"ל שאני מניח שחלק ניכר ממכם אינם מסכימים להשקפותיו בהרבה ענינים... ולא הייתם סומכים על פסיקותיו בעניני הלכה אחרים, יש לו רקורד ארוך בפרסום חוטאים מסוכנים במגזר הדתי לאומי.
ואולי מגיע לו על זה גם המון תודות!
אבל למה הוא מתערב בדברים שאינם קשורים למגזר שלו????
כלום המגזר שלו נקי מכל פוגע ותוקף שכבר אין לו במה לטפל שם שהוא צריך לעבור לטפל במגזר החרדי?????
שיניח לרבנים מן הציבור החרדי המטפלים בנושא הזה, ויש שמטפלים, לטפל גם בנושא הזה!!!
האם ראיתם פעם רב קטן או גדול שחורץ דינו של אדם בפוסט בפייסבוק?????
איננו בא לזלזל ברב הנ"ל ח"ו אבל נהרא נהרא ופשטיה, שהוא יטפל בבעיות של המגזר שלו, ויש הרבה הרבה בעיות ....
ויניח לרבנים במגזר החרדי לטפל בבעיות שלנו ויש הרבה הרבה...
מי יתן ויתקיים מאמר הכתוב "ואת רוח הטומאה אעביר מן הארץ"
בשורות טובות
בברכה
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ארי -2 years ago
Very well said! .רבי י. י. זה לא העסק שלך
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בן ציון אנדה -2 years ago
חלק מהמקרים היו ידועים לדיינים אחרים שטיפלו בתיקי גירושין שבהן האישה נאסרת על הבעל ועל הבועל. תעשה שיעורי בית, ותראה שמה שעשה הרב של צפת זה להציל את טהרת המחנה שלך, ומגיע לו יישר כח גדול.
הוא בעצמו אמר, שאם אתה רואה בית בוער עם ילדים בפנים אתה לא מתחיל לשאול מאיזה מגזר הם לפני שאתה מציל.
ואל תדאג, הוא נלחם את המלחמה גם במגזר שלו, וראש ישיבה כמו עזרא שיינברג נשלח לכלא בזכות בית דין זה.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
לא אמרתי שהוא לא נלחם במגזר שלו!
ההיפך אמרתי שהוא ידוע בתור אחד שנלחם מאוד חזק במגזר שלו!
אבל המשל של השריפה קצת לא נכון כי כשבוער שריפה קוראים לאנשי הכבאות היודעים ומסוגלים להתמודד עם השריפה ולא סתם בני אדם שרצים לתוך האש בלי שום יכולת להתמודד עם האש.......
במגזר שלנו לא מתממודדים עם הבעיות האלה דרך הרשתות החברתיות.....
אתה יכול לחשוב שאני כזה בן אדם מצומצם שכל הזמן מסתכל מאיזה מגזר בן אדם כזה או אחר מגיע, אבל ההיפך הוא הנכון אני מאוד מאוד שונא את הגישה הזאת, אבל במקרה הזה אתה רואה את השוני הגדול בין המגזר החרדי למגזר הדתי לאומי בדברים אלה
לחרוץ דין של אדם בפייסבוק!!!!????
יהא האיש מי שיהיה לא ככה מתנהג בית דין על פי התורה שדרכיה דרכי נועם (חס ושלום לחשוב שאני בא להגן על רוצחים ופושעים שפלים שחייבים להוקיע מן המחנה)
את זה עוד לא ראינו!!!!!!
אבל ברור שצריכים לעמוד לצידם של הנפגעים והנפגעות להקשיב להם להרגיש בצערם העמוק כתהום ולהשתדל לעזור לכל אחד ואחת כמיטב היכולת!!!!
ברכה והצלחה
ובשורות טובות
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Anonymous -2 years ago
I hope you can read in Hebrew on this wonderful site
I copy things written by Rabbi Yehonatan Grilak:
'זכות הציבור לא לדעת'
לאחר שבוע מיטלטל כשהסערה ממאמנת לחלוף, ובעקבות דיבורים ושיחות במרחב בית המדרש שלנו ומחוצה לו, נחשפתי לאוירת בילבול ותמיהה בלשון המעטה, בעקבות תגובת הגרי"ג שליט"א למהומה. כדרכם של דיונים, טענות עולות ודעות קדומות צפות, אי לכך חשבתי לנסות לעשות סדר בדברים, ו'לחזק ידי אנשי האמת ולישא ראשם', כמובא ברבינו יונה (שערי תשובה שער א' עיקר השבעה עשר). כל אחד ואחת מאיתנו, מגדולי המאמינים לכל הסיפורים עם כל הפרטים, עד קטני האמנה הבטוחים שהכל עלילה, בזמן שנודע על הסוף הטראגי של מושא התחקירים, לב כל אחד החסיר פעימה, בתוספת נלווית של תחושת קבס קלה עד חמורה. וזאת למה?התשובה לכאורה, שכל המצדדים לכל צד ועניין, מסכימים בדבר אחד: משהו בתהליך מתחילתו ועד סופו המר, לא כך היה צריך להראות, ולא כך היה צריך להסתיים. כל בר דעת שלבו ומוחו תקינים מבין שצריכים לצוד מפגעים, וח"ו אין מטרה לגונן עליהם ועל מעשיהם, אך באותה נשימה, מובן שהשפיטה בעניינם היא רגישה וזקוקה להכוונה של דין התורה. התחושה אצל כולם הינה, שכך לא מתנהל דין תורה - בדלתיים פתוחות. בעולם הטורף והמטורף שאנחנו מוקפים ישנם מגמות חדשות שהם נפלאות, כגון מודעות למוגנות וכד', אבל כל זה הוא בגדר חכמה בגויים תאמין, ומקבלים זאת בזרועות פתוחות, אך תורה בגויים אל תאמין! בתורת עמי הארצות הורגים בכיכר העיר על סמך תחקירים, ובתורת ישראל בודקים וחוקרים דיינים מומחים בדלתיים סגורות עד תום ההליכים.מה גם שפרסום ברבים משחית את הנפש עד היסוד. מאז ומעולם נמנענו מלדווח על דברים איומים הקורים לצערינו חדשות לבקרים, משום שאנו חסים על נפשותינו ונפשי צאצאינו ולא מכניסים מעשים מזעזעים שכאלו לתודעתנו, אך זה לא אומר שהם לא קיימים, ולא מטופלים.הערך העליון: 'זכות הציבור לדעת', הוא זר לנו. אנחנו דוגלים בערך העליון: 'זכות הציבור לא לדעת'. כל אדם שפוי שתורת ה' היא נר לרגליו, ומחנך ליראת שמיים את ילדיו, מעוניין מאד לא לדעת הכל.הגמרא במסכת מכות דף ט': גבי חלוקת ערי המקלט שאליהם נס רוצח בשוגג, ניתנו שלוש ערי מקלט בארץ ישראל ושלוש ערי מקלט בעבר בירדן. מקשה הגמרא: מדוע ניתנו בשווה ערי מקלט בעבר הירדן ובארץ ישראל, הלא בעבר הירדן שוכנים שני שבטים בלבד, ובארץ ישראל שוכנים עשרה שבטים? מתרצת הגמרא: בגלעד שכיחי רוצחים!והעירו הראשונים שם הלא ערי מקלט מיועדים לרוצחים בשוגג, ומה הקשר שבגלעד שכיחי רוצחים במזיד. ובמהר"ל בגור אריה כתב, שכשיש רוצחים במזיד בסביבה, נוצרת אוירה של זילות חיי אדם, ועי"כ מתרבים הרוצחים בשוגג, משום שכבר לא נזהרים כדבעי (עי' תפארת ישראל שבועות פ"א יכין י"ח שזו התביעה על שוגגין), ובתת מודע מוות זה כבר לא דבר נורא כ"כ (ע"ע באגרות משה חו"מ ח"א סימן ק"ז). וכמו לעניין הרג כך גם לכל עבירות. פעם ראשונה מזדעזעים, פעם שניה פחות, ולאחר כמה פעמים כבר זה כבר על גבול הלגיטימי. אי לכך כל פרסום, מזיק בטווח הקרוב ובטווח הרחוק. העולם הוירטואלי הרחב, מלא ברוצחים במזיד לעתים עם כוונות טובות, ומשפיע ופוגע ביושבי ערי המקלט שלנו, עד כדי כך שחלק מאיתנו מבלי משים, נעשים רוצחים בשוגג. כמו כן בחברה שסביבנו מקבלים ומכילים מעשים שלכל ירא ה' הינם טאבו, ומכח החיבור הרשתי חסר המעצורים, רבים מהמחסומים נפלו, ובסיפור האחרון כולם חשו וכאבו את הסרת המחסומים שכל דרדק דן ועסוק ביצר הרע במקום להיות שקוע בתבלין, והמבין מבין.בזה כולנו מאוחדים, שאין לנו עניין ורצון להיו מעורבים בפרסום עבירות ומעשים חמורים. ובכדי למנוע זאת בעתיד, ברור שכל אחד מאיתנו צריך לעשות השתדלות להחזיר את אמון בנות ובני ישראל בעם ישראל, ולבער הרע מקרבנו ברוח ישראל סבא.בתקוה ובציפיה שיסיר מאיתנו יגון ואנחה.חודש טוב ובשורות טובות
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Anonymous -2 years ago
thank you
thank you
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Anonymous -2 years ago
A night before this incident, on sunday, our school was zoiche to have an awareness day to educate and give tools to all parents and teachers of all ages, on this highly important and sensitive subject. This will be followed with a learning program for the students to enable them to detect gray area behaviours and empower them bez"h. The parents and teachers feedback was strong. They were very gratefull and now feel empowered and informed.
Unfotunately we are also being attacked by do-gooders who do not want this subject to be touched upon, especially if the speaker is academically proffesionally trained.
Thank you for giving us the encouragement and strength to do what is right and not what the system dictates. You are doing a great job.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Now there was another suicide. A victim. as Rabbi YY said:"it makes me crazy when people worry about the perpertrator and not the victims" It seems that in Eretz Yisroel the gedolom are also changing there tone.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
The Jewish community has an almost unlimited (and growing) number of speakers but too few credible spokespersons.
Good to see you speaking out so forcefully Reminds me of what you had to say after Tree of Life.
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יצחק -2 years ago
תודה הרב ג'ייקובסון!
,אין לי מילים על היותך הקול השפוי בחברה הטובה שלנו
people are in complete denial
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Easier said then done
Is there AAfor monsters maybe MA
SA not to take a side and defend but after Chaim wolder...
Alot of monster are crowling back in to there cave but there still exist and most were victims also and the were they became the monster...
Were do u turn to when u ask your therapist and the first thing they say is think before u sapeek I might have to report u...
In Israel there שלום בניך how many people know of them
In America is there something like that were there really trying
And even more so how much Dos it take to finally man up to it and all both side of the fence u being judge
I'm not saying he is right and he is wrong and I'm not playing down victims G-d forbid
I'm trying to say if u really want to take care of the problem
There got to be a place that he can also go for help with full confidence the his secret is safe and one day he will also be free
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Just to add
The victim is not the problem
The perpetuater is
And the victim need help and support
The perpetuater need more help he need to be stopped before there more victims and not alway Will u catch them
Better they come fwd looking for help
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David Baadani -2 years ago
As someone who hears the Rabbi's lectures every week, enjoys them very much and uses them as a basis for a weekly lesson for members of the congregation, I find myself a little confused after hearing this lesson. In Parashat Vayichi we learned from the Rabbi how it is easier to see Menashe, the black, the unpleasant, than seeing Ephraim.
Like חוט השני, there is a message in almost all of the Rabbi's lectures that the Jew is a part of the Divine and that the soul never disconnects from the divine. What confuses me in this lecture is. The comparison between the defendant and Pharaoh and Hitler. As if all the good things he did in his life are propaganda to cover up for the heinous acts he did, allegedly of course. And here is my question, is this really the way to look at this Jew?
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Im also a daily listner to the Rabbi's classes, and since this class i feel very confused and unsetteled, because the Rabbi allways teaches that despite all challanges the soul go's thru its still an ambasador of light hope healing etc. and a Jew is way more then all the challanges and sins it goes thru, so this lecture a bit confused this message,
I do strongly agree with the Rabbi that if all the stories are true (if) then it should not be shoved under the rug and get away with it, but after all its a horrable story of a souls journey, and its a pain for the Shchina and Hashem that a child should end up like this,
Rabbi please give some more clarity
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Chumi -2 years ago
More things to think about
I am a great fan of rabbi Y Y s shiurim and usually after big events happen it is his shiur/ insight that help me settle my emotions/thoughts and gears me towards growth. However after this shiur I am quite disturbed and even surprised. Rabbi Y Y s point of stopping the ccovering up in our community is definitely a right message (being a victim of sexual abuse by a known rabbi I am the first one to support that) however the confidence he is expressing in whatever has been said about chaim walder do not sit well with me at all.
As a mother of a son who went for therapy by Chaim walder and a s a victim of sexual abuse myself I did thorough research even before this tragic end and there are a few points I would want people to hear and think about;
1)rabbi moshe Eliyahu might be chief rabbi of Tzfas but he is not a mainstream rabbi- not a rabbi any of chareidi society would rely on for any halacha.
2) rabbi silman from being berak has asked rabbi Eliyahu for details and names but he wouldn't release any of it taking the whole story to his end
3) chaim walder didn't agree to come to beis din as None out of 22 agreed to come and face him/confront him. He felt there was an agenda to blame him without really giving him a chance to give his end of the story! None out of 22 actually opened a file at the police station. Chaim walder was never investigated or arrested. As a victim I understand how hard this can be but out of 22 None had the courage?? Chaim walder was left with anonymous victims he had to apologize to...
4) mainstream gedolim didn't approve at all on rabbi moshe Eliyahu s psak maybe because;
5) there is a system in place- you have a complaint go to police or rav- but shaming isn't a system!! Not the Torah way. Even if you want to warn people- so let it out once in the media and that's it. When At first it all came out chaim walder on his own left all his positions and understandably (if it's true or even partially true) he shouldn't stay in any position of chinuch or mashpia. Why did the media have to go on and on non stop about it?? Who gave permission for that?? Even if he failed - which we have no prove for- the only prove available is that there is one woman who told her husband that she went with chaim walder and as her husband believed her she was assur on her husband though it was never actually proven. This is halacha!! We never know what really happened and how things really happened. And we will probably never know!
6) before the media actually came out with this whole story as a mother of a child in therapy I was called twice with questions about the therapy and whether my son has been touched or harmed (which made me check it hysterically) and I was even promised money if I were to release any information!! As much as I told them all was 100%good- my son benefitted a lot from his sessions and he is even the hero in one of his stories !There were clearly people with an interest of releasing information...and he definitely did have a lot of enemies from many places...
7) as a summary- even if he did fail - tanaim and emoraim also failed. There are dinei shamayim and Hashem doesn't need our help! Yes- speak out. Yes- believe the victim. Support the victim. We might need to consider a new system for victims but spilling blood isn't beneficial for anyone! And we have our gedolei Yisrael who give us direction for everything- this included! Rav Gershon said he didn't commit suicide!! He was killed!! All of us who support the media and whatever it is saying...Rav Gershon surely also heard rav Eliyahu s perspective and he still didn't go with it!! We aren't allowed to accept lashon hara! And this too is lashon hara!
So very much in pain like the rest of klal Yisrael- so much looking to grow from it but perhaps l'iluy neshama we can finally change our system and stop the covering up we can also learn about lashon hara and shaming! This cannot become the new system!!
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Chaya k -2 years ago
Continue to dig your head in the sand
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Chumi Erenfeld -2 years ago
Are you aware that a letter came out from beis din in Tel Aviv with mainstream possek that says that chaim walder actually wanted to come to beis din but rav Eliyahu didn't want to cooperate and when asked whether the witnesses came themselves he said that in such incidents you don't need the actual witness. Someone else can testify for you!! How absurd is that??
There is one recording available between chaim walder and a woman that actually got divorced. Most probably this is where he failed but no more proves available at all. Thisnis still very sad and shocking but again- who are we to judge his yetzer hara and maybe he did do teshuva! When he knew about this recording being released and knowing chareidi society he understood that based on that everyone will believe everything else even if there are no proves for them whatsoever and he stands no chance in proving differently! Am not supporting his decision of suicide at all !!
But please don't blame me for digging my head in the sand.
I am just not accepting what media is selling me without checking and clarifying what daas Torah is saying! True authentic daas Torah!!
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Curious -2 years ago
Why not?
Who will be helped by my taking my head out of the sand? Will anyone be helped?
Who will be hurt by my leaving my head in the sand? Will anyone be hurt?
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Anonymous -2 years ago
100ֵ CORRECT
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JEFFREY WEISS -2 years ago
I am also a huge listener to all shiurim but this left me confused, perhaps rabbi yy deals a lot with victims, nevertheless the message of hope and love is gone suddenly.....
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JEFFREY WEISS -2 years ago
To clarify what I mean: I was expecting a more balanced approach, perhaps a bit more compassion for someone who was so sick nebach he needed to take his own life and maybe just maybe ....there's a chance he was not as guilty as a religious Zionist rabbi decided him to be without a real din Torah, it smells like the cancel culture mentality of today and not true hashkafah , yet I am open to hearing from rabbi yy perhaps a clarification as I perhaps do not know the facts?
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JEFFREY WEISS -2 years ago
After thinking about this, it really does make sense, and I write this to my above two comments and others who are confused...I think rabbi yy Needed to send a clear message to Klal yisroel and any potential predators...if he would balance his message with any other tone other then harshness it would be used as a sickening rationale for potential predators. We don't mention any compassion or understanding for sick individuals who can potentially harm others! But of course hashem is the ultimate merciful father etc and what a nebach that he fell so low etc
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Yes!
We must...
CANCEL CANCEL CULTURE
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Anonymous -2 years ago
That is a great point of view,where did you get your information from?
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Chumi Erenfeld -2 years ago
My husband spoke to dayanim of rav nissim karelitz beis din and there is written information too...I can forward it to you if you wish so you can see for yourself the contradiction between what rav Eliyahu is saying and mainstream rav Ben Shimon (tel Aviv beis din) is saying!
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Anonymous -2 years ago
please forward the written information from the batei din
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Chumi Erenfeld -2 years ago
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בן ציון אנדה -2 years ago
I hope you can read this article in hebrew. According to it, this Rabbi was dismissed for not protecting victims.
kikar hashabat link
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Chumi Erenfeld -2 years ago
Read the article. It was 2014 and clearly states that if he he is to be found guilty then he will be removed from his position which didn't happen.
So make your own conclusions!- it's actually not true.
If he weren't a talmid chacham giving a psak according to halacha we- mainstream chareidi society- would k own about it by our mainstream gedolim!
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Anonymous -2 years ago
As a victim myself I do not for a second believe you were a victim.
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Chumi Erenfeld -2 years ago
I am happy I don't sound like a victim anymore! My story happened 19 years ago with a well known respected rabbi that taught in yarchei kallah where I volunteered as mothers helper. I was 18 at the time and in a very vulnerable situation. The rabbi helped me a lot technically emotionally and spiritually. Until at one point he actually abused my trust in him and happened what happened. I know the feeling of freezing and not being able to move- not believing yourself it actually is happening to you!. I know the feeling of loneliness and distrust. I so know the feeling of hopelessness as Noone out there will actually believe you or even worse- might blame you for spreading lies and turn you into an unhealthy individual...I know it too well...
He obviously used his spiritual position to warn me it would probably be my greatest sin if I were to share this "relationship " - as he named it- turning me into part of it- with anyone!!
Hashem really helped me and my mentor -that I finally had the courage to share it with -took me very seriously. I went for therapy of course. And at the same time the rabbi was taken off all his positions and he was warned that rabbanim know what happened and he is being closely followed for any further cases Chas veshalom! He on his end right away accepted- apologized- and followed the rules... (which is very unusual) so in other cases maybe he should be threatened or often it needs therapy that needs to be forced upon the perpetrator and in extreme cases it might need jail! Especially if he doesn't cooperate with rules, therapy etc...
No- I didn't need the shaming. I didn't need his wife and children and grandchildren to suffer. They didn't deserve it! They were good people! (As a fact I know!!) Where would that bring me? How would that help me?
Yes- I suffer and suffered the consequences an awful lot but as long as I made sure it wouldn't happen to anyone else again and he made his teshuva (which is between him and his creator) I was free! Hashem surely took care of him and when it happened Hashem also knew it happened to me and had me in mind...it was part if His hidden plan to make me into who I had to become!! I believe it genuinely!! Don't wish it upon anyone! Am super protective over my own children but at the same time I am not carrying guilt for causing others (wife and children etc) to suffer because of me!
I don't need you to believe me but didn't we say the new system had to be believing the victims and supporting them?
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Wow! Your letter moved and inspired me.
What an exceptional person you are!
May you be gebentched with Naches and Brocha always.
Your clarity in this sad tragedy, teach us what a ROLE MODEL is!
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Thf Thf -2 years ago
Beatifully written. Can Rabbi YY Please Answer this?
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Zalmen Springer -2 years ago
Not to undermine the full credibility of all that you wrote (maybe just a little :) )
The name of rabbi Eliyahu, son of rabbi Mordechai Eliyahu ZT"L is rav SHMUEL Eliyahu, not rav MOSHE.
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בן ציון אנדה -2 years ago
I'm sorry for you. It's very hard to accept the reality. I also mourned my inoccence. Be brave and embrace the truth. Chaim Walder was more like a monster than a ZTL. I threw 14 books in the recycling bin.
And yes, you should demand from your rabbis to setup a Beth Din to take care about such problems. They are not doing enough now. Blaming Rabbi Eliahu won't help you to protect your children.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
You wrote that you were offered money if you were to come up with any information. That sounds a bit scary to me. I think that needs further investigation. Is there someone in some kind of authoritative position whom you can share that with?
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Jane
Rabbi,Wow! Phenomenal Shiur. You Shiurim always lift me up. Rabbi, you are so emes, kind, & down to earth. I am one of these sensitive people for myself & others. I like to help other while not forgetting about me - all with a balance. I agree w/you the truth always wins out. I am working on finding myself & grateful to HKBH everyday. Chazak.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
I live in eretz yisroel and hope that this shiur or shiurim like this could be translated to hebrew. There is to much fear here to face the truth and be honest with ourselves so we all learn the lessons. In school my daughter was told by her teacher that its loshon hora to talk about " it ". I dont think the girls should be discussing all the ins and outs etc... but to be told its " loshon hora " ???. I was deeply hurt for all the victims when I heard that and they should all know that we are with them and hurting and cyring with them and share in the great pain they must be experiencing.
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Gittel -2 years ago
Maybe it is indeed loshon hora?
Certainly if one was a victim, then that's different. Victims need to be heard, supported and encouraged.
But are any of the girls in your daughter's class victims?
If not, discussing this serves no purpose and may indeed be considered loshon hora.
As an aside, why is it so difficult for us to acknowledge that there's a lot of information here that 1 - we don't know, 2 - we don't really need to know, 3 - we probably don't really want to know, and 4 - we probably never will know?
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Well said.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
im not sure if this mean loshen hora dont have time for explanations but it depends in michzek loroshe mimer and dover mefirsem
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Anonymous -2 years ago
A true genius - thank you Rabbi. We are blessed to have your incredible chochma!
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Can control self
This lecture explaims how toxicity will inevitably be found as we approach redemption. There are passing comments regarding how challenging it can be for addicts to control themselves. Those two elements in isolation could suggest that urges can be insurmountable, or that lapses can be excused. However, the remainder of the lecture shows how the Rabbi would agree that it is possible to fight one's urges so as to avoid hurting others. For example the old rebbe in the story the Rabbi shares waits outside his home to avoid being alone with an older woman. Thus, precautions can be taken. Perhaps the dross that accumulates prior to redemption could be subtle things within our community, and less subtle things outside our community, without involving crimes perpetrated by people who should know better.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
יישר כח, הרב, על הדברים הברורים והנוקבים ועל פועלך לטיהור החברה החרדית
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Motti Slodowitz -2 years ago
Question for Rabbi YY
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A Yid -2 years ago
Thank you for sharing this - may you have comfort from all this pain.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Not sure - but what about Rav Biderman. Don't stop fighting for justice. Good luck - may H-shem be with you.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Mr. Slodowitz,
I was close with your daughter. I know a lot of her story and I know how much pain you, her father, put her through. You had no relationship with her and fought with her in court as she was on her death bed. Do you even know how much suffering you caused her, especially at the very end of her life? To the people reading this, he's blaming the abuse on an ex's family member, when we already know who it was. Shame on you for using your daughter's death for revenge. You are a sick, sick man.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
To Anonymous ( remining so does not helkp your credibility)
Sadly for my daughter, Miriam was alientaed from her loving father. Patental Alienation is child abuse. Children do not alienate a parent with out the help of a parent. She was alienated (as were many doctors and therpaists and rabbis that asked questions). She was Alienated to keep a secret. Yes I sued her Hospital to keep her alive. The judge in court stood up for me with Honor and respct wondering why no one else but me was there to try and save her life. The only shame and sickness is in the family and illinformed do gooders that protects Child molesters. She suffered from Trauma that her family knew about and kept a secret.
Thats the topic of the above shiur... I suggest you listed to it again.
I hope that my daughters death could at least bring more awarness to prevent other victims. Yes that would be my Revenge.
Parental Alienation is child abuse. Child abuse can reult in death.
Do you still want to remain anonymous ?
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Mordechai.
Yes mordechai. Not Mr. S. You don't deserve the title. I'm not the original anonymous replier, so I think you'll be glad to know you have a full fledged hate club ranging from Mia's closest friends to the nurses and doctors in the hospital that got to know mia. First of all the identity of the child molester is not buried with Mia. She chose to reveal to certain individuals who it was. And ha- you are so far from the truth. Have you ever wondered why a 10 year old would keep a secret like this? She didn't feel safe with you mord. I wonder why. And on alienation - it's not alienation if the child initiated it. I should now. I've alienated from a horrible parent. Go thank the Lord that your younger children didn't follow suit. I don't know what they see in you. But maybe you're not a total narcissist around them, revealing the true you that mia got to know and hate. Chaya may have made mistakes but at least she owned up and apologized to mia. And she wasn't even the culprit here. YOU were and are. And those who truly loved mia (that doesn't include you mord) hate you and blame you. I know how people like you work - I was raised by one. You'll probably reply with a comment trying to put your ex and me down and praise yourself somehow. I'm not here for that. Thus I am posting anonymously too. I don't need another person like you in my life. There's enough. And I completely agree with the original replier. You couldn't even leave her alone in her last months. You're not holy mordechai. You can't force your extreme beliefs on your children. You weren't saving her. She was going to die anyway. Amd she died with not only no apology from you but also having you fight her at the end. Again. You didn't love precious mia. You love your precious ego. And don't think Gd will be sending you to heaven. The hottest of Gehinoms are slated for parents such as you mordechai slodowitz. Gd doesn't care for your religious fanaticism. I'm sure He doesn't. And I know you'll know when you die. The judge stood up for you? I'm laughing because that's exactly what my crazy parent who I chose to cut off from would say. Children don't alienate without the help of the other parent? Check. That's what a crazy narcissist who cares about no one but himself would say. Enjoy hell mordechai. Or maybe you'll be forced to be one of those souls who wander. Whatever it is you will not be enjoying the afterlife. I hope you're happy. You helped kill Mia. Your behavior indirectly assisted the molester and kept Mia quiet. I have a lot more to say but that would take years. So I'll end here. But YOURE guilty mordechai slodowitz. So so so guilty. I wish I could have known mia and reported you to child services those years when she was under your irresponsible care. I don't see you atoning for this any time as you're a horrible person who doesn't see himself in the wrong when he is. People in the world like u unfortunately exist. And mia had the terrible luck of having you as a father. May hashem avenge her death.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
How can I watch this class if my filter blocks YouTube? It is not available yet on the phone either... Thank you!
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ADMIN -2 years ago
We're sorry for the delay, the class will be fully uploaded here by tomorrow morning.
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Good for you that YouTube is blocked (mine too)
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טוביה הלר -2 years ago
Speak to the filter company
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cirel lipskier -2 years ago
להוציא יקר מן הזולל
to refine the gold from the dross
an additional expression
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shaina -2 years ago
Thank you for todays class. I deeply appreciate your addressing the recent disturbing news. It’s the only way to make sense of something utterly un-sensible…WOW is all I can say to your elucidation.
May we all continue to be zocheh to see the emerging light of Moshiach…
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Owner CY3469 RIFKI BRAUN -2 years ago
Awesome Rebbe!!! THANK YOU!!!!! My dose till my next dose was gevaldig f shtark Emuna!! And beetachon!! TY! TY!! Tzku Lemitzvos!!! May u be gebentched to keep up ur holy avodas hashem!! Amush! W Mashiach !!!
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Live meaning it already began and I can view it Live in real-time because I can't seem to access the livestream?
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Ali -2 years ago
Ali Leverton
Can I still access this on Zoom? If so what's the link or password or login please?
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ADMIN -2 years ago
Sorry, since this class is given live, in-person now, it is not given over Zoom. You can watch it LIVE here!
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Anonymous -2 years ago
Ok TYSM for clarifying!
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Hannah Hall -2 years ago
Is this class the same time and day of the week every week?
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ADMIN -2 years ago
Yes, 12:45 pm every Tuesday
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