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Is There Only One Right Way to Raise Your Child?

The Conclusion of the Series on Narrative Therapy. Class 4 of 4

29 min

Class Summary:

The Conclusion of the Series on Narrative Therapy. Class 4 of 4

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  • C

    Chaim -10 years ago

    Very Good
    Thanks by sharing and offering so useful advices. They´re not complex but simple, but it´s good to hear about.


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  • L

    Laura -10 years ago

    videos
    Shalom, extrañamos los video de Rabi Jacobson en español, cuando los retoman?



    Muchas gracias!

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  • C

    Cesar -10 years ago

    Leccion!
    Necesitamos mas videos y articulos en español!!!

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  • C

    Claudio -10 years ago

    Muy lindo!
    Muy buen articulo!

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  • J

    Jeff -13 years ago

    "How Life Works"
    Well said about constructively/healthily encouraging children to learn about who they are and about the constructs of life - not punishing them, but, rather, teaching them lessons of "how life works". We take it for granted, but a child doesn't come into this world knowing how to conduct themselves in our social fabric - they look to us and people around them as models. A minimized and pigeonholed/typecasted child becomes a minimized and typecasted adult - boxed in. Also, it is likely what a child learns about their self is also how they will perceive and treat people in adulthood - it's davka what they were taught as a child about "how the world works". We adults need to give the gift of space and time to children to make mistakes. ...And then be there for them lovingly to take the time and space to reflect, question, understand, and teach - make quality time and quality/high-standards of communication, such as being specific and not taking things for granted that the children come into this world already knowing "how the world works".

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  • Y

    Yitzchok -13 years ago

    Beautiful Shiur
    I wish you could talk about how we can implement this concept of מעט אור דוחה הרבה חושך in a world of tiny tablet computers and and wireless filth. How can we protect them from falling into the dirty street?

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    • A

      Anonymous -13 years ago

      Re: Beautiful Shiur
      [QUOTE]I wish you could talk about how we can implement this concept of מעט אור דוחה הרבה חושך in a world of tiny tablet computers and wireless filth. How can we protect them from falling into the dirty street?[/QUOTE]

      מעט אור דוחה הרבה חושך Some light rejects much darkness. This principle, light, is absorbed by people/youngsters who want to absorb it, not all. But the rest of them will be ready for it in some future, when their souls will be ready. It happens before, and it will be happen again with the Jewish Nation. Maybe, some small push is needed, like to invite “ignorant” child to Shabbat, Pesach seder. This way he/she will see, hear and learn. I did not understand importance of this process myself several months ago when some charity organizations ask me to donate for University’s students meetings.

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      • M

        Michale -13 years ago

        Re: Beautiful Shiur
        I forgot to type my name. Sorry.

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      • A

        Anonymous -13 years ago

        Re: Beautiful Shiur
        #1: Pay close attention to the story of the Alter Rebbe in class 2.

        #2: Your thinking and your words, should be focused (laser beam like), at and about

        your children's goodness and successes (all of us struggle and all of us have times that we win).

        Make sure that you see your children's successes and goodness story it by telling them what and how you noticed. By consistently doing this you will assist them in their struggles against unwanted outside

        influences and they will be able to use their inner strengths to overcome attractions to what you call

        "wireless filth".

        PS Please listen carefully to my presentations the answers to you questions are there.

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        • M

          Michale -13 years ago

          Re: Beautiful Shiur
          Rabbi, I am not the person who has asked you this question. I have started to read a book "Four Kingdoms" by M. Levusch and would like to extend my point in conversation before. Light is interpreted by Chachamim as spiritual connection a body to Hashem, and Darkness is connection to below, material world. When a child requests more stuff from his/her parents, similar as friends have, Tablet PC, and so on, it is his/her nefesh request. The parents need to "work" on this part of the child, nefesh. How make his/her nefesh less “material", this is the big question.

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          • M

            Michale -12 years ago

            Re: Beautiful Shiur
            Rabbi, I did not get the answer from yet. Thanks.

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  • C

    Chana -13 years ago

    Consequences
    What are some effective consequences for a four year old girl who annoys/hurts her 2yr old sister? Is time out effective? How should it be done? What is more effective?

    What about that same child who cries as soon as she doesn't get her way?

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    • A

      Anonymous -13 years ago

      Re: Consequences
      First of all if you will be noticing your four year old 10 times a day, when she is sitting quietly, playing nicely, coloring, or just behaving appropriately, “Mushka you are sitting and listening to the story” “Mushka you built a little castle, it’s so big and you worked so hard to make it”, noticing just what she is doing, that’s all. The chances are that she won’t bother her 2yr old brother any more. Do this consistently, it works. As to consequences, you can tell her to “stop” or “red light” or anything that will let her know that she crossed a boundary of inappropriate behavior. This needs to happen without anger and without raising your voice. Let her know, and let her have a 20 second time out right there in her place. If however she keeps doing it, the consequences could be something very simple. Taking away some time, for instance 2 minutes from her favorite activity,, this is NOT a punishment, it only a consequence.

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  • M

    Michale -13 years ago

    Comments count is wrong
    To Administrator: comment count shows 3 when there is only one.

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    • A

      Anonymous -13 years ago

      Re: Comments count is wrong
      Thanks, We fixed this.



      [QUOTE]To Administrator: comment count shows 3 when there is only one.[/QUOTE]



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  • KT

    Kayo, Tokyo -13 years ago

    To be a light
    Baruch HaShem



    Thank you for your great lesson that anyone can be a light that will chase away darkness.

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  • M

    Michale -13 years ago

    Thank you
    Thank you, Rabbi, for the great shiur.

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